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Credit where credits due: Many thanks to Gman for the Tumbometer scan

Title: Tumbometer 4
Author: Zang Tuum Tumb
Source: Zang Tuum Tumb

TUMBOMETER

ZANG ZUUM TUMB

Dear dear Zangsters, HAN-kie Frankie FAN-kies and other interested parties.

Dear oh dear.

You could call this a comeback. You could call this an announcement. You could call this ‘Sebastian.’ You could call this an up-date. You could call this Tumbometer No.4. In the end, before the beginning, it’s just another paper bit of bits and pieces for those of you who might just think ‘whatever happened to zang tuum tumb?’ For that matter, whatever happened to the clothes we wore? Whatever happened to the things we saw? Whatever happened to The Bible?

Whatever, as in the shoulders are shrugged and the boulder is rolling; a Tumbometer must concern itself with information, a chunk of truth and a few weak lies. To begin, after the end, ever so candidly: this Tumbometer arrives at just the right time to inform you that from Monday 25th of August 1986 the fifth Frankie Goes to Hollywood single will be on the shelves in your favourite records shops. As if you did not know, as if you did not care, as if you thought we would not mention it. The fifth Frankie Goes to Hollywood single, ‘Rage Hard’, will become number 22 in Z.T.T.’s Action Series, a series that began with ‘Relax’ and that will end with a smile.

‘Rage Hard’ is about understanding that you will never fool the children of the revolution, and it’s packaged as would be some toy in a post-revolutionary country in one or other alternative universes. That might not concern some of you, which is more than fair enough. In that case, ‘Rage Hard’ is hi-metal tech melodrama; positive noise for those of you driven beserk by Anita Dobson and Chris De Burgh. Life need not be a dreary sentimental sing song sing along.

For those of you who just want to introduce some strength back into your system after one of the silliest summer seasons ever, ‘Rage Hard’ is ready for you as a seven inch in plain glory, an a side, a b side and a colour sleeve, straight excitement for your own private room. For those of you who wish to join in a single consumer adventure, ‘Rage Hard’ will be prepared and packaged in other formats. ‘Rage Hard+’ is the firsT twelve inch, including on the second side a sci-zip-fi run up of Bowie’s ‘Sufragette City’. A limited edition of this twelve Inch also include an elegantly vandalised poster of Frankie Goes To Hollywood: with lipstick and crayon you can add you own personal slangy. If you are feeling seriously whimsical and can never resist sophisticated frivolity, there is also a limited edition seven inch ‘Rage Hard’ packaged as a gate fold glossleeve featuring bonus moving parts. ‘Rage Hard++’ is the second twelve inch, as radically different from the first twelve inch as a kiss is to a fingernail: on the second side there is a roughed up down run of The Doors ‘Roadhouse Blues.’ A limited number of people who pick up this second twelve inch will also receive a containing box to place their cuttings, posters, photos, souvenirs, records etc. that have something to do with Frankie Goes To Hollywood’s ‘Rage Hard.’ At the end, by the beginning, for those of you addicted to sound, a compact disc containing 25 minutes of edited highlights of the single will be manufactured and in the shops.

The most devoted of you will then have a beautifully boxed ‘Rage Hard’: everyone can look forward to the Frankie Goes To Hollywood long player, their second, called ‘Liverpool.’

Further information about ‘Liverpool’ and about other Zang Tuum Zumb projects will come to you in the next Tumbometer, in a months time. To give you a small tantalizing idea of what is coming in the next Tumbometer: there will be news of Claudis Bruecken’s new group, the true identity of the best while male singer in the world who has signed to Z.T.T., ten reasons why you should tryout the Andrew Poppy 12” ‘32 Frames The Impossible Net’ which is released on September 15th, odd thoughts from members of Frankie Goes to Hollywood, an introduction to the way outs and the lifestyles of a brand new more than pop group that Z.T.T. have signed, and a few reasons why the new group Trevor Horn is building will carry on the original pre-Duane Eddy Art of Noise spirit light.

This is now the end, before the beginning, of this Tumbometer. All you questions will be answered, in time. For now: consume, consider, contain, control.

‘You can bump and grind.’