Smash Hits: Holly, do you have any birthmarks?
Holly: Not that I can think of. I’ve got a weird assortment of freckles when the sun comes out, though.
Smash Hits: What do you wear around the house?
Holly: Not much. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: Have you ever seen a ghost?
Holly: I haven’t, but my father has. A lady keeps waking him up in the middle of the night, asking him if he wants a cup of tea.
Smash Hits: Tell us a secret.
Holly: No! (Laughs)
Smash Hits: If you were on ‘This Is Your Life’, who would you least like Eamonn Andrews to produce from your past?
Holly, My primary school headmaster, Mr May.
Smash Hits: Do you hop in and out of baths, or lie there for ages?
Holly: It depends. I try to get out before me (my) fingers go wrinkly, though. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: What do you wear in bed?
Holly: Sometimes I wear me (my) socks, if its cold.
Smash Hits: Can you whistle?
Holly: Not very well, no. I always wanted to be able to do one of those fabulous whistles with yr (your) fingers, but I can’t. My whistle’s pretty pathetic. (Whistles) You know, that kind of thing.
Smash Hits: Do you have smelly feet?
Holly: Only if I wear the same shoes for like, two days, which isn’t very often. But like, they would be , if I didn’t wash ‘em (them). (Laughs) Y’ (you) know what I mean? Everyone’s are!
Smash Hits: Can you speak French?
Holly: Je ne parle pas Français, monsieur
Smash Hits: What’s the best thing about being a pop star?
Holly: Not being on the dole. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: What would you have inscribed on your gravestone?
Holly: Erm, “He wasn’t all that bad, really”
Smash Hits: What is your earliest memory?
Holly: I remember singing to the pigeons, in school. But I remember also before school, having this little girlfriend called Jackie Bacon And I used to play with her.
Smash Hits: Are you in love?
Holly: Yes!
Smash Hits: When was the last time you hit someone?
Holly: Oh God! it was two nights ago, but I didn’t really mean to.
Smash Hits: Ped, what were you in a previous life?
Ped: I was a snail.
Smash Hits: Do you worry about your weight?
Ped: Not really, no. I mean now and again, but it doesn’t really bother me.
Smash Hits: If you were on ‘This Is Your Life’, who would you least like Eamonn Andrews to produce from your past?
Ped: Suppose, some teachers that taught me, and used to beat me up. I should imagine.
Smash Hits: What would you do, if you were invisible for a day?
Ped: I’d love to go ‘round Beverly Hills, climbin’ into these houses, and lookin’ at these er, filmstar-esses (Dodgy Laugh)
Smash Hits: Do you prong. or squash your peas?
Ped: I mostly flick them at whoever’s sittin’ next to mi (me).
Smash Hits: Do you speak French?
Ped: Un, deux, trois, that’s about it.
Smash Hits: What’s your favourite joke?
Ped: My favourite one’s, Knock, knock.
Smash Hits: Who’s There?
Ped: I wannap
Smash Hits: I wannap who?
Ped: Yeah, that’s my favourite one.
Smash Hits: Do you have any bad habits?
Ped: I should imagine, fartin’ in pr… in company, like.
Smash Hits: Nasher, How do you keep fit?
Nasher: I don’t. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: Have you ever been humiliated by a magician?
Nasher: No. Who does these questions?
Smash Hits: Were you a swot at school?
Nasher: Never went to school. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: If you were a domestic appliance, what would it be?
Nasher: A Hoover. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: Can you whistle?
Nasher: Not wi’ mi (my) fingers. (Whistles) That’s about it.
Smash Hits: Can you do any impressions?
Nasher: Only, of er, people around me. Not, are very well famous.
Smash Hits: Who can you do?
Nasher: Er, Paul.
Smash Hits: Do it.
Nasher: “Oh, it’s really sweet. Sweet. Great.” That’s it.
Smash Hits: What’s the best thing about being a pop star?
Nasher: Gettin’ to meet so many people. Gettin’ to travel around the world free, and people buyin’ yr (you) drinks.
Smash Hits: What’s your earliest memory?
Nasher: Er, sittin’ in a pram, outside the place where I used to live. I was around two years old, with a box of Cornflakes.
Smash Hits: Mark, if you were on ‘Mastermind’, what would your specialist subject be?
Mark: Don’t know, suppose it’d be music, I suppose. Wouldn’t do very well at it, though. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: What were you in a previous life?
Mark: I think I’d be a spotty dog.
Smash Hits: Tell us a secret.
Mark: I went out with your girlfriend, last night. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: Were you a swot at school?
Mark: No, not really. I went to a thicko school.
Smash Hits: Do you have any recurring dreams?
Mark, No, not really. I’m never asleep long enough to have a dream.
Smash Hits: Can you whistle?
Mark: (Whistles) Yes.
Smash Hits: Are you ticklish?
Mark: Yeah, very ticklish.
Smash Hits: Did you pass your cycling proficiency test?
Mark: Yeah! (Laughs) Yeah, I did. I did. You had to like er, you went in the playground at school. Everyone used to be driving in and out of cones, and all that.
Smash Hits: What’s the most stupid TV programme you’ve ever seen?
Mark: The most stupid, and the best is ‘The Young Ones’. It’s just like, the best TV series ever known to mankind.
Smash Hits: Do you think flowers scream when you pick them?
Mark: No, but I think they bleed, in their own little way. (Laughs)
Smash Hits: Paul, tell us a secret.
Paul: Boy George shaves.
Smash Hits: Do you have smelly feet?
Paul: (Sniffs) No (Laughs)
Smash Hits: What would you have written on your gravestone?
Paul: Oh, “Good riddance”, (Laughs)
Smash Hits: When was the last time you cried?
Paul: Oh, I think it was a long time ago. I haven’t cried for a long time. I try to, but I can’t. (Laughs) Such a hard man.
Smash Hits: Do you think flowers scream when you pick them?
Paul: I think they like being picked, because they know people only pick them, ’Cause they love someone.
Smash Hits: Are you in love?
Paul: Very much so. I think the world is beautiful. (Laughs)
Credit: Thanks to JD for the transcription.