ZANG TUMMM TUMB ARTICLES “the first draft of history”

Ah, good day.Whispers here. And Whispers only. Well start this week with Frankie ‘cos youre obviously interested in nowt else.

“Its about time we had a laff like. A bit of mischief…” promised Ped in No.1. So now theyve started. Seems the lads are a bit particular about which members of their record company take them away on foreign TV promotions. So when one good lady was assigned to the task who failed to fit the requirements for Frankie chaperone they immediately took the offensive.

While she waited at the ‘Rage Hard video shoot on the edge of Londinium they sneaked up on her flash car and let all the tyres down. Words were had, the AA was sent for and up they were pumped again after much inconvenience. So what did they do? Let them down again of course. Tee hee…

Ruthers has also been raging hard. Theres been a right little humdinger in Germany where the Frankies were recently for TV. Seems a particularly offensive hack for one of the local rags added injury to insults (comitted previous) when he grabbed Paul by his jacket. Naturally Ruthers retorted with a swift kick to the oafs shin, much to the delight of the rest of the band.

Since then the story has swept fearfully through Europa as “Frankie knees journalist in willy region! Shock! Horror!”

Says Paul: “I know exactly where I hit him and if he wants to hit me back hes quite welcome. Mind, Ill knock his nut off!..” Rage!…

What else can we tell you… Ah, Wogan… Did you know that Paul and Hollys original plan was to go on in Dr Who outfits that they stumbled across while rummaging through the Beebs costume dept? A particularly fetching combination of a giant rat and a lizard was foiled when some hoity propman slapped their wrists.

And why was Peds kit all bandaged up, you wonder? No, not ‘cos it was feeling poorly. Apparently it was the BBCs ‘concept to fit in with the ‘Rage Hard video which was babes and boys swaddled in bandages. Nice one…