ZANG TUMMM TUMB ARTICLES “the first draft of history”

Frankie and George Michael are getting on like hot cakes. Georgie Boy went to Birmingham to see the band last week and after the show it was decided theyd all try to blag their way into David Bowie and Tina Turners hotel ten miles out of town, Bowie having guested with the squawking siren that same night. So various Frankies nipped into Georges car, full of excitement, meeting old hero, blah blah. Imagine their surprise on arrival at finding David and Tina had gone to bed with flu!

Anyroad, the by now bevvied party drowned their sorrows in the hotel bar where Michael haughtily proffered his American Express card as payment. “Just a minute, sir,” says the barman superciliously and goes off to check GMs credit rating! “I just dont believe this,” muttered a blushing Michael.

The evening ended in high spirits however with a return journey, taken up by a singalonga Whamafrankie, popping of Moet magnums and much ribald laughter. Then, as they pulled back into Birmingham poor old George was taken poorly and blooergh! He deposited the contents of his stomach all over the car, bye bye glamour boy image, open the windows quick somebody!

Naughty Nasher suggested they collect the resulting pavement pizza and raffle it off…