ZANG TUMMM TUMB ARTICLES “the first draft of history”

Claim to fame


So here we are, singlehandedly keeping the banana trade in business, and can we get discount down at our local fruit n veg stall? No we cannot, but were still relying on you to sneak up on the now not-so-unsuspecting popstars clutching a banana (for which well award you £10), a copy of No.1 (£5) or assorted fruit (£5).

And for our more forward readers, well give a fiver for any pic we print of you kissing a popstar. Got that?

Okay. Now send your snaps. with your name and address written on the back, to Claim To Fame, No.1, Room 304, Commonwealth House, 1–19 New Oxford Street, London WC1A 1NG. Dont forget to include a short note explaining how you met them.

This banana lark is catching. Sandy Basek met Frankie when they went to Hollywood and passed a nana in the general direction of Paul Ruthedford. Paul, being the avid No.1 reader he is, immediately clicked what she was up to and asked if he could have it for his pud after hed posed with it. Sandy says the bank were “sooo nice” even tho they demanded plenty of beer and Led Zeppelin music!

Hmmm… were not sure if this one qualifies, but for sheer dedication to duty well send Wendy from Mapperley a tenner — it cant have been easy carting that thing all night.

Wendy says that she and her pal Georgina were too embarrassed to get in the picture and that Bronskis Jimi Somerville thought they were being rude when they asked him to pose with the mega-banana. No.1 readers, rude? Never!

Now what is Simon Le Bon trying to do with that banana to a young lady called Sarah? All she and her mate Jo Walton had one was ask him to hold Mot a moment — and here he is trying to shove it up her nose! Doesnt he know bananas have teelings too?

Heres Suzanne Jones demonstrating how to plant a smacker on the cheek of your fave pop star. “I told Paul it was for No.1.” she says. Lucky we have a good relationship with Mr Young (well, until we printed this pic!) and he was only too happy to oblige. Suzanne says hes “really nice and loyal to his fans”, and that if was her lucky day — she met Andy Ridgeley and kissed Gary Numan too.

Daliah Leverson really went for it when she spotted Durans Nick Rhodes browsing through the shelves in the Forbidden Planet bookshop.

First it was “Pose with this issue of No.1“ (which out happened to have his features adorning the cover), then it was “Hang onto these three bananas for a sec”, and finally “Howsabout a big kiss?” Daliah says the reason you cant see the kiss is that the camera chose that moment to pack up. Sounds a likely story to use, but as shes offered to donate half the money she gets to the Ethiopian appeal, well give her the benefit of the doubt. We reckon we owe you £20. Daliah.